Haruhi turned to me.

  “Is that so...?”

  That’s not how I would have described our conversation. I still don’t know what was going on in Shinoyama’s mind.

  “Something like that...”

  Shuusuke slapped me on the back.

  “Well, I’m happy for you, dude. Maybe we can have a real ‘double date’ sometime! What do you say?”

  “Maybe...”

  Haruhi was more enthusiastic about the idea.

  “That sounds like fun!”

  “Well, we should leave you two to it, then. We don’t want to intrude on your picnic.”

  “See you later, dude.”

  “Matsuda-sama, I look forward to when our paths will cross once more.”

  We then went shopping. Well, I say we went shopping, but we never seemed to end up actually buying anything. Window-shopping, I guess.

  Haruhi held up a cute sweater.

  “What do you think?”

  “I think it would look great on you.”

  She put it back with a sigh.

  “It probably would...”

  This pattern had repeated a few times already.

  I thought she wore the same hoodie all the time because it was comfortable, but maybe she has an aversion to buying new clothes. I can understand why she wouldn’t want to spend the money her mother worked so hard for frivolously, but she deserves to buy something for herself every once in a while.

  I checked out the price tag.

  Yikes. I guess high-quality women’s clothing is expensive. It’s hard being a girl.

  “I can buy it for you.”

  I might have to buy fewer light novels this month, but that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make for my girlfriend.

  She shook her head.

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  “I don’t have to—I want to.”

  “Well, I don’t want you to do something like that for me. I don’t want to be a burden on anyone else.”

  I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and gave her a side hug.

  “You’re not being a burden. And I’m not doing it for you...”

  She cocked her head to the side.

  “What do you mean?”

  “My motivations are purely selfish—I just want to see you wearing it.”

  She turned her head away.

  I tried to say something boyfriendly, but I think she had to look away because it was too cringe.

  They were my honest feelings, though...

  “Well, if you insist. However, I also want to buy it, so how about we split the cost? We can bear the burden equally. That only seems fair.”

  I told you it wasn’t a burden. And if you wanted to buy it, why not just buy it in the first place?

  But...

  I nodded.

  “That works for me.”

  I guess this is just how we are.

  After that, we continued shopping, splitting the price evenly for anything that caught both of our interests.

  It looked like I wasn’t going to have anything left of my light novel budget this month at all—or the next. And the new volume of Princess & Tentacles was coming out this month too... I always tried to pick up volumes from more niche authors day one to support them.

  Sorry to the author of Princess & Tentacles, but my girlfriend is more important.

  When we finished shopping, both of our arms were full of bags. It didn’t make sense to lug all the bags to my house only for her to have to take them back home, so Haruhi suggested that we drop them off at her place since we were already in the area.

  I was now waiting outside the large apartment complex where she lived. She had insisted I wait there, instead of helping her.

  ‘I don’t want to have too many important memories on a single day. You can come over some other time.’

  I couldn’t argue with that logic. It had already been a long day with many memories.

  The doors to the apartment complex opened, and out came Haruhi.

  “Mom said I could stay the night again, as long as I spend tomorrow with her.”

  “That’s nice.”

  Haruhi grabbed my arm.

  “And she wants to meet you sometime next weekend.”

  “I’m down for that.”

  It would probably be awkward, but I did really want to meet the mother that she loved so much.

  When we returned home, Fuyuko and Yuriko must have already returned from their date, because Fuyuko came down to greet us.

  “Welcome back, Onii-chan! Where did you two run off to?”

  “Well, we decided to go on a date of our own. Speaking of which, how did yours go?”

  “Hang on.”

  Fuyuko scampered off.

  She seems energetic. It probably went well.

  Haruhi spoke up.

  “It seems like it went well.”

  “Yeah.”

  We had thought the same thing.

  Fuyuko returned, dragging Yuriko with her. Yuriko was wearing the same outfit as when we went to the concert together, and her face was bright red.

  “Onii-chan, I’d like to introduce you to my girlfriend.”

  I already know her, though.

  Good for them.

  Apparently, Yuriko was also spending the night—she’d stayed the night plenty of times before, so that was nothing new, but it was the first night she stayed over at our place as Fuyuko’s girlfriend. All four of us spent the rest of the day together playing video games in Fuyuko’s room and then ate dinner together. It was fun.

  Haruhi and I were in bed again. Tonight, I was holding her, though. It only seemed fair.

  Today was the happiest I’ve been in a while.

  Today was the most fun I’ve had in a while.

  Which is why—

  Can you be satisfied with just ‘fun’?

  Don’t you want a different kind of ‘fun’?

  Shut up.

  She said you could do anything you wanted.

  I know that’s not what she meant. I know she wouldn’t want that.

  But you want it.

  Shut up.

  Didn’t Fuyuko tell you to stop suppressing your own desires?

  She didn’t mean it like that.

  Just keep denying yourself.

  Shut up.

  What is she?

  ‘Beautiful.’

  And what are you?

  ...

  ‘Disgusting.’ Don’t you try and deny it.

  Yeah, I’m not allowed to be happy.

  Don’t think about it.

  17 - Love?

  Sunday.

  Haruhi left immediately after breakfast, and Fuyuko and Yuriko went out at one point, so I had the house completely to myself for a bit. It was nice. It had been a while since I had that luxury.

  After some alone time, I was resting on my bed.

  I sighed.

  I don’t feel like watching anime...

  ...

  I rolled over and looked at my shelves of otaku stuff.

  I don’t really feel like doing anything...

  ...

  Haruhi...

  I wonder what she and her mom are up to...

  ...

  I bet they’re having fun...

  ...

  I sighed and rolled over again.

  Is my brain broken?

  ...

  Haruhi...

  I sighed.

  I sighed again.

  I sighed again, again.

  What’s wrong with me?

  ...

  I could watch anime.

  Or I could sigh again.

  I sighed again.

  ...

  I’m lacking energy.

  I don’t feel like doing things I would normally want to do.

  Isn’t that depression?

  You’re in love.

  That can’t be true.

  That’s fucked up.

  Isn’t love supposed to be beautiful?

  Why would it feel the same as being depressed?

  ...

  Shouldn’t it be a buff?

  Not a debuff?

  ...

  Something is wrong with ur game, plz fix ASAP.

  ...

  Haruhi...

  I literally was with her all of yesterday and this morning...

  How am I this much of a mess already?

  ...

  If this is how Haruhi felt going without a physical connection with people, no wonder it drove her crazy.

  ...

  I sighed.

  This sucks...

  ...

  Fuyuko...

  When’s Fuyuko going to come back?

  18 - Another Day

  Monday morning.

  Fuyuko and I met up with Yuriko at the intersection, like usual. They greeted each other, like usual. Fuyuko clung to Yuriko, like usual. If you didn’t know that they had started dating over the weekend, you might not have noticed anything different between them.

  I guess it was like with Haruhi and me. A change in mindset...

  At the station.

  Haruhi told me about her day, like usual. She told me all about how she spent the day with her mother yesterday. It seemed like they had a lot of fun.

  Good for them.

  I asked if we could walk home together today, but she said that she had something she needed to take care of.

  “Have a nice chat with Kondou-san.”

  Yeah...

  Before school.

  Izumi greeted me, like usual.

  “Good morning, Matsuda-san.”

  I nodded in reply, like usual.

  Chiaki was reading a book, like usual.

  I looked at the cover, like usual.

  I sat at my desk, like usual.

  The running girl was late for school, like usual.

  Lunchtime.

  I played Meteor Witches with Haruhi, like usual.

  Shuusuke bothered me about something, like usual.

  I pretended to ignore him, like usual.

  After school.

  That’s when the usual day ended.

  I walked straight home.

  It had been a while since I’d gone straight home. Maybe I’d even get home before Fuyuko. She was usually there to greet me when I got home. Maybe I could reverse our roles today.

  With that thought in mind, I hurried along the narrow street toward my house. I passed the empty park and arrived home.

  “I’m home.”

  I announced my return, like usual.

  And I came face-to-face with Mia.

  “Ahh!”

  I stumbled backwards in surprise.

  Fuyuko...

  She had really run this joke into the ground—had she never heard of the rule of three?

  The life-sized cardboard cutout of Mia reached its hand out to me.

  “Are you okay?”

  I grabbed the outstretched hand and pulled myself to my feet.

  “Yeah. I’m used to it by now.”

  “That’s good.”

  “...”

  “Still, it’s cute how easily startled you are.”

  “...”

  “Oh, I almost forgot. Welcome back, Onii-chan~”

  “...”

  “Where’s your little sister’s ‘welcome back’ kiss?”

  “......”

  “Uh-oh, I think I might have broken him.”

  “.........”

  “Onii-chan needs a reboot!”

  After a reboot.

  “What are you doing here, Mia?”

  “Mia is my stage name. My real name is Mimori Ayaka. Please call me Ayaka.”

  “What are you doing here, Mimori-san?”

  She pouted and remained silent.

  “...”

  “Are you going to answer me or what?”

  She held her hand up to her ear and furrowed her eyebrows.

  “Did I hear something? Must have been the wind.”

  I sighed.

  “What are you doing here, Ayaka?”

  Ayaka smiled and clasped her hands together.

  “It’s only natural that a little sister would greet her older brother when he returns home.”

  “You’re not my little sister.”

  She put one hand on her hip and wagged her finger.

  “That’s where you’re wrong. Fuyuyu gave me permission to be your little sister.”

  “Fuyuko doesn’t get to decide that!”

  “Fuyuyu recognizes me as her big sister, and if I’m her big sister, that makes me your little sister. That’s just how it works.”

  “That’s not how it works.”

  Things are more complicated than that...

  She cocked her head.

  “Why not?”

  “You can’t just become someone’s sister—you either are or you aren’t—and you aren’t.”

  “What about stepsiblings? In-laws? Do they not count?”

  “Those are different.”

  She nodded.

  “They are different, but they’re still real siblings.”

  I give up.

  “I can’t argue with that.”

  She smirked.

  “That’s right, you can’t. Because I’m right, and you’re wrong”

  This brat...

  “Yeah, yeah. So, what do you want?”

  She clung to me.

  “I want you, Onii-chan.”

  I pushed her away, holding her at arm’s length.

  “I mean, why did you come here? Wait, how did you even get inside?”

  It somehow took me this long to notice.

  “Fuyuyu told me where to find the spare key.”

  “Fuyuko...”

  Someone needs to teach that girl a little something about operations security...

  Ayaka giggled.

  “Anyway, it’s only natural that a little sister would live in the same house as her older brother, isn’t it?”

  “And you think you can just waltz into our house and start living here?”

  She cocked her head.

  “Why can’t I? You have a free guest room.”

  “What about your job? Did you just run out in the middle of something?”

  Why else would she be in that idol getup?

  She shrugged.

  “I’m taking an unannounced break.”

  I just realized I don’t care. If she wants to ruin her career, she’s free to do so.

  “Whatever, it’s your life. But I’m not letting you stay here.”

  She gave an exaggerated sigh.

  “Oh well. Guess I’ll have to find somewhere else to crash.”

  She gave in surprisingly easily.

  “I’m sure you can afford a hotel.”

  She shook her head.

  “I was thinking of wandering the streets late at night, waiting for some nice young man to take pity on me. Of course, I would have to repay him for his kindness. What has the world come to where a beautiful young idol like myself has to sell her body just for a place to sleep? If only there were some other way...”

  I know she’s messing with me. I’m not that dumb.

  “You can just stay in a hotel.”

  “Spending the night in a love hotel with a married man who has a daughter around my age—he knows he’s doing something wrong, but that just makes things all the more titillating. It has been a while...”

  “A normal hotel!”

  She looked at me like I was dumb.

  “Why would I want to fuck in a normal hotel? That’s what love hotels are for. Are you going to deny them their purpose?”

  “You don’t need to f-f-do that with anyone! You just need a place to sleep!”

  “How am I supposed to fall asleep without some goodnight dick?”

  “WHAT?!”

  She made a jerk-off motion with one of her hands.

  “You crank one out before you go to sleep every night, don’t you? It’s kind of like that.”

  “I d-don’t do that!”

  Not every night.

  And I use my other hand...

  She looked surprised.

  “I thought every guy did that? At least, my brother always did...”

  “Why would you know that?!”

  “We shared a room before he moved out. He thought he was being stealthy, but I always knew. I even offered to help him out once, but he turned me down...”

  Wait.

  I forgot that she’s just messing with me and got caught up in her pace.

  I took a deep breath to calm myself.

  “Fine, you can stay the night.”

  I’m pretty sure she’s just a compulsive liar, but it couldn’t hurt for one night. I don’t really have any reason to refuse.

  Her eyes lit up.

  “I love you, Onii-chan! I can’t wait for tonight...”

  “Nothing’s going to happen tonight!”

  She pouted again.

  “It’s been a while since I’ve spent a lonely night with just the girls. But if that’s what must be done to live with my Onii-chan, then I’m willing to make that sacrifice.”

  “The girls?”

  She held up her right hand and grabbed her index finger with her left hand.

  “Mary—”

  Then her middle finger.

  “Shirley—”

  “I get it. I don’t need to know all of their names.”

  Ayaka gave me a sultry look.

  “Unless you’re willing to lend your hand?”

  “No. I have a girlfriend.”

  “And if you didn’t have a girlfriend?”

  “I don’t engage in hypotheticals.”

  “Hmm, so you’re running away...”

  I got caught up in her pace again...

  This girl is dangerous.

  I sighed.

  “Anyway, make yourself at home. For now.”

  I hope I won’t regret it...

  So that’s Mia’s—no, Ayaka’s—real personality, huh...

  She was even more intense than the few times I’d interacted with her.

  And that was how this very usual day somehow ended with a very unusual idol staying the night.

  19 - Late Night, Another Ayaka

  It was late at night and I couldn’t sleep.