Haruhi wanted to walk home with me today.

  “We haven’t walked home together since we started going out. I want to.”

  “There’s something I want to do after school today.”

  “I can wait. You can message me when you’re ready to leave.”

  “If you’re fine with that. I don’t know how long it will take, though, so don’t wait outside in the cold.”

  “I was thinking of killing some time in the library. I could talk to Kondou-san. I would like to get to know your other friends better.”

  “Hmm...sounds fun.”

  2 - The Disappearance of Mimori Ayaka

  Despite not knowing anything about the magic club except for the name, I knew exactly where it was.

  Better not think about it too hard.

  The crudely hand-drawn sign told me that this was definitely the right place.

  Knock knock.

  A bright voice answered my knock.

  “Come in.”

  I slid open the classroom door.

  Before me was a girl I had never seen before.

  “Hello.”

  She smiled.

  “What brings you to the magic club? Are you here for one of my famous tarot card readings?”

  She seemed friendly.

  “No, I was actually looking for another member. She told me to come to the club if something strange happened.”

  Her smile faded into a slightly concerned look.

  “Did something strange happen?”

  “Yeah.”

  That’s why I’m here.

  “That sounds like something Saya-chan would say. Unfortunately, she’s not here today. She said she had to perform an exorcism or something like that.”

  “An exorcism?!”

  She cocked her head.

  “Or maybe it was a seance? I can’t keep those things straight. Dealing with spirits isn’t my specialty—I prefer fortune telling.”

  “I see...”

  “Well, our club advisor, Naru-sensei, might be able to help you. She’s close with Saya-chan, so she might be able to get in contact with her if it’s urgent. Ah, by Naru-sensei, I mean Naruse Makoto, the school nurse.”

  “I guess I’ll go talk to her then.”

  The girl raised her hand and gave a parting wave.

  “Good luck, Matsuda-san.”

  “Thanks for the help, uhh—sorry, what’s your name?”

  “Yuuna. Asahina Yuuna.”

  Her name sounded familiar, but I don’t know where I would have heard it before.

  “Have a good day, Asahina-san.”

  “You too.”

  The door closed with a rattle.

  ...

  Did I ever tell her my name?

  Better not think about that too hard.

  Naruse-sensei uncrossed and recrossed her legs.

  “So, what brings you to the infirmary? An ache? A cold? Or did you just want to see me?”

  So she’s aware of her reputation.

  “Actually, Nozawa-san told me to come to the magic club if something strange ever happened to me, but she’s not there today, so Asahina-san suggested I talk to you.”

  She nodded.

  “I see. I see. So, did something strange happen to you?”

  “Yeah.”

  That’s why I’m here.

  “If you tell me what it is, I’ll see if I can help.”

  “Have you ever heard of an idol named Mia? I remember her, but it seems like everyone else has forgotten she existed. It’s like she never existed in the first place.”

  Saying it out loud makes me realize that I just sound crazy.

  She put her hand to her chin, thinking for a moment.

  “I think I’ve heard of her.”

  She then named a few of Mia’s songs.

  “If we both remember her, then why doesn’t anyone else?”

  “A situation like this is probably caused by Revocation. If her wish had something to do with her becoming an idol, then it being Revoked would make it seem like she disappeared entirely. She probably still exists, it’s just that she’s not famous anymore, so we wouldn’t know about her. If you remember the state of the world pre-Revocation, then you must also bear a Contract.”

  “I don’t know what any of that means.”

  She seemed surprised.

  “If you remember, then you must have a Contract. Have you not met Nozomi? I feel like it would be hard to forget an encounter like that.”

  “Who’s Nozomi?”

  “That’s one of the names they go by. They call themselves a Witch, but I think they are one of what Saya calls ‘Travelers.’ Unfortunately, I don’t know much more than that. According to Saya-chan, I have low spirit sense and magical capacity, so I can’t perceive these kinds of things very well. She might be able to tell you more.”

  That doesn’t help at all...

  “What is Revocation?”

  “An important clause written into every Contract is that you can’t tell anyone about the specific details of your Contract without it getting Revoked, so we have to be careful when talking about this stuff. If your Contract is Revoked, then all of its effects are undone and the world is rewritten to be as if it never happened. That’s probably what happened to Mia. If you have strong memories of the differences, you can hold onto them. But if you let go, you’ll accept it. They might still be there, but the replacement will start to seem more and more natural, and the old memories start to feel like a dream. I don’t know much about the specifics; this is just what I’ve observed myself due to having a Contract for a long time. This is not my first Revocation, and most of the time they go completely undetected because it’s someone with no connection to you at all. Mia’s is only so noticeable because she was so famous.”

  “She did tell me about an ‘otherworldly encounter’ and about what she wished for.”

  She nodded again.

  “That would do it. It’s important not to tell anyone your wish or it won’t come true, you know?”

  I feel like Fuyuko told me something like that during our first shrine visit of this year.

  Wait.

  Didn’t something strange happen just before that? I can’t quite remember the details, but maybe I met this ‘Nozomi’ then. After that break is when my life started changing, so that seems likely. I don’t remember what I wished for either, but it was probably something stupid.

  “I think I might remember when I could have met her, maybe.”

  A slight smile rose to her lips.

  “You don’t seem very confident in that, but even if you don’t remember the specifics, as long as you remember when, you might be able to figure out what you wished for based on what you wanted at the time. If you do come up with an answer, don’t tell it to me, of course.”

  What I wanted...

  Right now, all I want is to spend time with Haruhi. Whatever I wanted back then doesn’t matter. Whatever else I might want doesn’t matter. I don’t need to shake things up by thinking too hard.

  Revocation, Contracts, Witches, Travelers, spirit sense, magical capacity, soul control. I don’t want to get involved in any of this stuff. I can’t handle such a radical shift in my understanding of the world, so it would be better to just ignore it.

  Pretend it doesn’t exist.

  Like always.

  “Thanks for the help, Sensei. I feel a lot better knowing I’m not going crazy.”

  “I’m happy to help. It’s my job to ensure the health of the student body. I think that includes their mental health as well as their physical health, so I’m glad I could put your mind at ease. If you ever have any other worries, you can always talk to me about anything. I know what it’s like. When I was your age, I was not in a good place mentally, and I didn’t feel like I could talk to anyone about it. Then, Nozomi appeared. I feel kind of guilty for being lucky enough to fix my problems with magic when it’s not so easy for most people. I know now that magic wasn’t even necessary. Even if Nozomi hadn’t appeared, I could have lived the life I wanted—maybe not exactly as I wanted, but close enough. But the best thing I can do about that is to use my life to help other people.”

  I wonder what she was struggling with. Obviously she can’t tell me even if she wanted to share.

  “That’s admirable.”

  She gave a pained smile.

  “I try.”

  Then she clapped her hands together and her expression brightened as she pulled her phone out of her lab coat pocket.

  “But enough of that depressing stuff. Check this out. Over winter break, my wife and I went to the Bahamas.”

  Here she goes again, talking about her wife. But I get it, now.

  She showed me a picture of her and her wife on a beautiful sandy beach, with their arms around each other. And they were wearing some daring swimsuits, their bodies glistening.

  I don’t know if this is school appropriate...

  “Looks like you two had fun.”

  She nodded.

  “It was nice and warm, so it was a great way to spend winter break. Just because we think of December as being cold doesn’t mean that’s true everywhere else in the world. That’s just our perspective based on where we live.”

  She showed me a few more pictures.

  Damn, you’re giving these away for free?

  “Umm, why are you doing this?”

  “I want to be as visible as possible.”

  Is that what she’s into?

  “I don’t think you should be sharing your exhibitionism kink with schoolchildren...”

  I’m not going to complain, but you might get fired...

  She karate chopped me on the head with an annoyed look on her face.

  Ow.

  “I mean visibly queer, ding-dong. I’m sorry that my wife and I are so smoking hot that you consider normal pictures of us at the beach to be salacious.”

  “Sorry...”

  “Representation is important, in real life and fiction. In my time working here, I’ve had multiple people confide in me about their sexualities. Just being able to see other people like you can help you understand yourself better. And being someone they know they can talk to about it is reassuring. There are challenges with being so forward about my identity, but I think the comfort it can provide to those questioning themselves is deeply valuable. Also, I want to show off my wife.”

  So that is part of it...

  “I get it. My little sister’s best friend came out to me, and I told her about you to help reassure her. If she didn’t feel like she could talk to me about it, maybe she would have talked to you once she started attending here. Ah, they’re going out now, by the way. Her and my little sister.”

  I felt like she would like to know that.

  She smiled.

  “Good for them. It’s great they could figure that out relatively young.”

  “Yeah, good for them...”

  “Hmm...?”

  Why is she looking at me like that?

  “What is it?”

  “Nothing. I was just thinking about the past.”

  “?”

  The phone that was still in her hands dinged.

  “Oh dear, it seems like Saya-chan’s exorcism got a little out of hand. All of the mysterious happenings surrounding that place got attributed to a single entity, but there were apparently three spirits residing there instead of just one. She says she’s okay though.”

  It’s cute that she plays along with Nozawa-san’s chuuni nonsense.

  “Well, my girlfriend is waiting for me, so I should get going.”

  Sensei typed out a reply to Nozawa’s message then waved goodbye.

  “It was nice talking with you. Feel free to stop by anytime—you can tell me about anything. And if you need any help with supernatural matters, Saya-chan is there to help. I’m glad you listened to her advice. You seemed pretty shaken by whatever happened before, so I’m glad you felt like you could trust her enough to come to her for help. I told you she was a good girl.”

  I should get out of here quickly.

  “Yeah, goodbye.”

  I didn’t wait for a reply.

  3 - Beautiful Daydream

  Haruhi insisted I hold her again. She was massaging my fingers like yesterday. Whatever she wanted was fine by me.

  She interlaced her fingers with mine and broke the silence.

  “So, I’ve been thinking lately...”

  “About what?”

  “About life. And love.”

  “Hmm...”

  “I was thinking that I wouldn’t be me if it wasn’t for all of my life experiences. Even the negative ones. It might not be true, but it’s comforting to think about, so I like it. I mean, I never would have met you if not for them. And I enjoy the time that we’ve shared together. In this moment, I wouldn’t want my life to be any different. But, if it were, I would probably feel the same way. Just about something else. About someone else.

  “Before I met you, my life was starting to improve. Even if I hadn’t met you, things would have kept getting better. I would have graduated high school. Started attending university. And had a brand-new setting full of opportunities for me to meet new people. I just had to hold out a little bit longer and things would have become better. That’s what I’ve been thinking lately. A little daydream of mine when we’re not together.”

  “Beautiful.”

  “You’re complimenting me again?”

  “No, that thought. That daydream. It’s beautiful. I don’t think I could believe that.”

  She squeezed my hands.

  “I don’t even know if I do. But I want to believe that it’s true. Or maybe I need to believe it.”

  I squeezed her back.

  “Whether it’s true or not doesn’t matter, because what is true is that we’re together right now.”

  “That’s true...”

  “Yeah...”

  The silence continued for a little longer.

  “I’m sure it’s the same for you too. If you hadn’t met me, you would still be surrounded by so many people. Maybe you’d be dating Chiaki.”

  I played the scenario out in my head.

  “If I focused on my story more, maybe that could have happened...”

  “Maybe you’d be dating Yuriko.”

  “I don’t know about that one. She’s a lesbian. Plus, she’s already in love with Fuyuko.”

  “She didn’t always know she was a lesbian, right? You both love Fuyu-chi, so maybe you would have gone out with each other to try and please her.”

  I played the scenario out in my head.

  We both buried our true feelings and tried to make it work with each other, but it was unsustainable, resulting in lots of drama for everyone involved. It might have been fun to watch as an outsider, but it wouldn’t have been very fun to live.

  “That’s actually depressingly possible.”

  “Maybe Reina.”

  “She’s been dating Shuusuke since before we met—that wouldn’t happen.”

  “Feelings change. They could break up.”

  I played the scenario out in my head.

  It was messy, resulting in lots of drama for everyone involved. It might have been fun to watch as an outsider, but it wouldn’t have been very fun to live.

  “I guess that’s possible.”

  “Maybe Izumi.”

  “Huh? How do you know about her?”

  “She’s famous throughout the whole school—everyone knows her. She’s really popular and many people have asked her out, but she always declines, saying she already has someone she likes.”

  “If she already has someone she likes, why do you think I stand a chance?”

  “Really?”

  “What?”

  “There’s lots of speculation about who she likes, but one of the theories is that it’s you.”

  What?

  “Why me? How is that a popular theory?”

  “People who went to the same middle school as you two say that you were pretty close back then. Until you two suddenly stopped talking to each other.”

  “We weren’t that close—she was just friendly with me the way she’s friendly with everyone. There was never anything special between us.”

  Just because a girl is nice to someone doesn’t mean she’s into them.

  “That’s just the theory.”

  I didn’t even need to play that one out in my head. It wasn’t going anywhere. Even if she were into me, I would never go out with her.

  “I don’t want to talk about her anymore.”

  “I’m sorry if I brought up some bad memories.”

  “It’s fine.”

  “Maybe someone else you didn’t encounter this time.”

  Like Ayaka?

  I played the scenario out in my head.

  If it weren’t for Haruhi, it’s possible we could have ended up being closer. I didn’t dislike her, but I don’t think we were really a good fit for one another either—I couldn’t have been whatever she wanted me to be. Her love for me was probably doomed from the very beginning. It might have been fun to watch as an outsider, but it wouldn’t have been very fun to live.

  Are most of the routes in my life bad ends? What about this one?

  Don’t think about it.

  Maybe there were even more people that I theoretically could have met if things had been slightly different. I tried thinking of people within a close proximity to me. Nozawa Saya? One of the other members of the magic club? The running girl? Or someone I’d never even met?

  “That’s possible.”

  “Maybe...you have a future with Fuyu-chi.”

  “Hold on. No. Don’t even joke about that. That would never happen. I don’t think about her that way.”

  Why does everyone think I have a sister complex? I sure hope there’s no little sister route in my life.

  “Even if you can’t get married, you’re already family. Who says you can’t spend the rest of your lives together?”

  I think in that Anne of Green Gables anime that I watched together with Fuyuko when we were younger, the main character was adopted by a brother and sister that lived together and were basically like a married couple. So I guess it’s possible...

  “I guess so.”

  “The only difference is the name of the relationship. And what it’s called affects people’s assumptions about how the two parties feel about each other, about how they think about each other, about what they do with each other. Friends. Lovers. Platonic partners. Family. They’re all the same thing at their core—it’s all love. What you call it doesn’t change that.”