“Hey.”

  “If your hands are cold, we just need to warm them up!”

  Holding hands with a girl.

  It should have been exciting, and yet...

  Fuyuko’s not a girl. She’s my little sister, you know? It’s different. Conceptually, she lies on a different plane than ‘girl.’ Yep. Basically, she’s not a girl at all, to me. Right now, she’s just a glorified hand-warmer.

  We continued holding hands until just before we arrived at the intersection where Yuriko was waiting.

  “Onii-chan, you go on ahead.”

  Fuyuko took off down a side street.

  Where was she going?

  Whatever.

  I spotted Yuriko and raised my hand in greeting.

  “Good morning, Akio-san.”

  “Good morning, Yuriko-san.”

  It had been a while since Fuyuko enacted ‘Operation Buddy Buddy,’ so we were pretty used to calling each other by our first names by now.

  “Did Fuuko catch a cold or something?”

  “Nah, she was with me until just a moment ago. I don’t know where she ran off to.”

  “I see. How very like her.”

  “True.”

  “...”

  “...”

  “...”

  The conversation quickly fizzled out, leaving an awkward silence between us. Yuriko’s eyes wandered around, seemingly unsure of where to look, eventually settling on some point behind me. I also avoided looking at her, and instead looked up at the distant gray sky.

  We only ever interact with each other because of Fuyuko. Without her here, we don’t have anything to talk about.

  After a while, I spoke up.

  “This doesn’t happen too often, does it? Just you and me without Fuyuko, I mean.”

  “No, it doesn’t. You could probably count the number of times it’s happened on one hand...not that I’ve kept track.”

  Wasn’t that a kind of tsundere-ish line? If she had put a bit more emotion into it and tacked an ‘or anything’ onto the end, you could definitely see that comment coming out of a tsundere’s mouth. Maybe Yuriko is kind of cute after all, and her cold side is just a front...

  Or maybe you watch too much anime.

  “So, uhm...I guess we should just wait for Fuyuko? Although, I might need to get going soon, or I’ll miss my train...”

  “Don’t worry. She’ll be here soon.”

  Surprised by the confidence with which she said that, I took my gaze off the sky and looked down at Yuriko. As I did so, I noticed Fuyuko sneaking up behind her. When Fuyuko realized I was looking at her, she held her finger up to her lips, silently shushing me.

  I see. She went in a different direction to try and get the jump on Yuriko. She was planning a sneak attack like she did to me this morning.

  Let’s see how this plays out.

  Fuyuko continued her silent approach until she was directly behind Yuriko. She really was stealthy. Then, she raised up her arms, lowered her hips, and sprang into action.

  Except Yuriko ducked in the nick of time.

  Fuyuko sailed right over her target and crashed into me. I was knocked to the ground, but Fuyuko somehow managed to convert her fall into a handstand and flipped over me. She landed gracefully on her feet and spun around to confront Yuriko.

  “How?! How did you respond to my sneak attack so quickly?! Can you read minds?! Did you sense my loving intent?! I made super sure not to accidentally say anything this time!”

  “I could see you the entire time.”

  Yuriko pointed up at one of the convex mirrors that you sometimes see in intersections to improve visibility around corners.

  “Aghh. I should’ve checked my surroundings more. Onii-chan, this is all your fault!”

  “Huh?! What did I do?”

  I had stood back up from where I had fallen, only to be accused by my little sister of some nonsense.

  “You looked at me, which made me distracted.”

  “How’s that my fault?”

  “Because if you weren’t there, it wouldn’t have happened!”

  I still don’t think it makes it my fault though. I didn’t intend to distract you. Does intent not matter at all?

  “Good morning, Fuuko.”

  “Good morning, Yuuko.”

  Fuyuko seemed to completely forget all about me, and returned the greeting.

  Was that Yuriko’s intention with blurting out a greeting so suddenly? Maybe she’s a nice girl after all.

  I should leave before Fuyuko remembers that she was arguing with me.

  “Well, I don’t want to be late.”

  “Where do you think you’re going, Onii-chan?”

  Fuyuko’s voice was chillier than the winter air as she grabbed my right wrist with her left hand. It reminded me of when we held hands earlier that morning, except this time her left hand had a much more sinister intent. It was a shackle, and I was its prisoner. And, there was another prisoner shackled by her right hand.

  “Me too?!”

  “I left you two all alone together, and you weren’t even able to have a conversation that wasn’t about me! I thought you two were more comfortable with each other now, but I guess you need another push. It’s time to initiate ‘Operation Buddy Buddy,’ Phase 2!”

  Not again...

  3 - Phase 2

  “First things first, skin contact. Sharing a physical bond will help improve your emotional bond as well.”

  ““What?!””

  Fuyuko shook our arms up and down.

  “Come onnn, just try it! It won’t kill you!”

  I didn’t know about that. Yuriko looked half dead already.

  Fuyuko pulled our hands together, forcing us into some kind of awkward handshake.

  She seemed dissatisfied with the result.

  “You call that holding hands? Hold hands like you mean it!”

  I felt her grip tighten around my wrist.

  Ow. Ow. OW. What dojo does this girl train at?!

  “I’m sorry, Yuriko-san. We should get this over with as quickly as possible.”

  She nodded in agreement and we curled our fingers, turning the awkward handshake into something that could truly be called hand-holding.

  Holding hands with a girl.

  It should have been exciting, and yet...

  “Yessss. Yessss. Veeery nice.”

  It was kind of hard to enjoy when we were being forced into it by a certain someone. Fuyuko was speaking like a lecherous old man for some reason.

  “Fuuko, is this good enough? Can we let go now?”

  Yuriko seemed on the verge of tears, and her face was flushed. I was feeling pretty embarrassed by the whole situation too, but it seemed to be much worse for her.

  “Let go? You’re just getting started! You guys are staying like this until Phase 2 is over!”

  ““There’s more?!””

  Fuyuko nodded.

  “That trial seemed more difficult for Yuuko, so next is Onii-chan’s turn.”

  Uh-oh. I can’t disagree with her assessment, but it’s still pretty hard for me too!

  “So, what do I have to do?”

  “Onii-chan, you have to start and maintain a conversation with Yuuko, and I can’t be mentioned once. Just pretend I’m not here.”

  That’s going to be pretty hard to do when you’re standing right here, gripping both of our wrists!

  “Umm...”

  Surely I can think of a topic.

  Something.

  Anything.

  “...Nice weather we’re having, isn’t it?”

  A freezing blast of wind tore through the intersection, chilling me to the bone.

  “Akio-san...you really suck at this.”

  Ouch.

  On the upside, it seemed like I embarrassed myself so spectacularly that Yuriko was feeling less embarrassed herself.

  Yeah. I totally did that intentionally. I’m just a nice guy like that.

  “Onii-chan, I’m really worried about you. At this rate, you’ll die alone.”

  “Where did that come from?”

  “As much as I would like to, I’m not going to be by your side forever. If you can’t even hold a conversation with a girl, you’ll never be able to get a girlfriend.”

  This is getting too real. Do I really give off that much virgin loser energy?

  “H-How do you know that I don’t already have a girlfriend that I’ve just never told you about?”

  ““We know.””

  An instant reaction from both of them.

  Yeah, it’s immediately obvious to anyone who interacts with me that I have a terminal case of negative rizz.

  “Urgh. I’m sorry I’m such a pathetic older brother.”

  “Onii-chan, don’t beat yourself up too much. You just have to get used to it—that’s why I’m here to help. Let me give you a hint: If you don’t know what to talk about, you can always try asking about someone’s hobbies. People usually like to talk about the things they’re passionate about.”

  That makes sense.

  Okay, I can do this.

  Can you, really?

  “So, Yuriko-san, what do you like to do in your free time?”

  “Um...I guess I like to read books and listen to music?”

  Now I should ask some kind of follow-up question, right?

  “What kind of books do you like to read?”

  “Nice follow-up, Onii-chan!”

  “How are we supposed to pretend you’re not here if you keep butting into the conversation?”

  I’ll take the compliment, though.

  “Okay, I’ll keep quiet and give feedback at the end.”

  After waiting for our brief interlude to end, Yuriko replied.

  “Just normal stuff...”

  Normal stuff...what’s that supposed to mean? It’s kind of an evasive answer; maybe I should switch to another topic.

  “What kind of music do you like to listen to?”

  “You know, just normal stuff.”

  Again? Give me something to work with here! She’s Fuyuko’s friend, so there’s no way she doesn’t know about Mia. I’ll try steering the conversation in that direction.

  “Do you listen to any pop idols?”

  She gave a small nod.

  “I’m a big fan of Mia. Her voice is amazing.”

  “I like Mia too. She really is an amazing singer.”

  This conversation is so weird. We’re both talking like we don’t know that the other person is obviously a fan of Mia. If we weren’t, there’s no way Fuyuko would stick around with us.

  “Yeah...”

  “...”

  The conversation kind of died there. I think Yuriko also realized how weird it was.

  Fuyuko’s grip relaxed, letting us go.

  “Onii-chan, you actually did a decent job, even though you didn’t have much to work with. Don’t forget to also talk about yourself sometimes—a conversation has two sides! If all you’re doing is asking questions, it’s more like an interrogation. Yuuko, you might need some help as well. You should elaborate more—a conversation has two sides! If you’re only answering questions, it’s more like an interview. The questions are merely an opportunity for you to talk about yourself. The more you talk, the easier it is for the other person to ask follow-up questions. Understand?”

  ““Understood.””

  I feel like I just got lectured by my teacher for getting something wrong in class. I don’t think my problem has to do with the theory of holding a conversation, though—I just don’t get much out of it, so it’s too much of a pain in the ass to bother trying.

  Fuyuko turned to look at me.

  “Onii-chan, you didn’t have these problems before. You got along well with the girls in elementary school—too well, if you ask me...”

  Yeah, I peaked in elementary school. How pathetic is that?

  “Well, things were simpler back then...”

  Before I could even finish my pathetic excuse, Fuyuko turned to Yuriko.

  “And Yuuko! You always talk just fine with me, so I didn’t realize how much trouble you had talking to other people. Get ready for some intensive training later! I’ll get you a boyfriend in no time!”

  Yuriko’s face instantly reddened.

  “I don’t want a boyfriend!”

  60 points. ‘It’s not like I want a boyfriend or anything!’ would have given you a perfect tsundere score. You still have much to learn.

  “It’s okay if you’re not ready for that kind of relationship right now. Conversation skills are always going to be important.”

  “I can talk with you—isn’t that enough?”

  “One day you’re going to want to talk to someone else!”

  “Maybe...”

  “Well, that’s a wrap on Phase 2. We should probably get going, or we’re going to be late. Is it okay for you to be standing around like that, Onii-chan? You’re going to miss your train.”

  Shit.

  4 - Running Late

  I usually arrived at the station with plenty of time to spare, so I still had time to catch the train if I ran. It was going to be close, though.

  Because I wasn’t that athletic (understatement), my breathing was ragged as I descended the steps into the subway station. I was in such a rush that I stumbled on the last few steps and fell to the ground.

  Ow.

  Just a little bit more. The platform is right around the corner.

  I tried to push myself up, but instead collapsed.

  The floor was cold against my cheek.

  Do you really need to push yourself that far just to get to school on time?

  It’s expected that you arrive at school on time. It would be bad if I didn’t, right?

  Will anything bad happen if you don’t arrive on time?

  Well, probably not. But it would still be bad if I didn’t, right?

  I managed to stand up and took off for the platform. I rounded the corner just in time to see the doors closing.

  I didn’t make it. I guess there’s nothing else to do but wait for the next train...

  My mind, free from worrying about catching the train, finally noticed something. I stuck my hand in my pocket and rooted around, but there was nothing in there.

  Where’s my phone? I must have dropped it when I fell earlier.

  I spun around on my heel and returned to the stairway. Sure enough, my phone was lying at the bottom of the stairs. Thankfully, the screen wasn’t scratched or cracked. I quickly checked the time before returning it to my pocket.

  Maybe it’s not so bad that I missed the train. If I had made it in time, I would have left my phone behind. Yeah, I should look at the silver lining.

  You wouldn’t have dropped your phone if you weren’t in a rush to begin with.

  And whose fault is that? Is it Fuyuko’s fault for holding us hostage? Is it my fault for not being able to talk to Yuriko in the first place?

  Don’t think about it.

  It doesn’t matter where the blame lies. It already happened. The past can’t be changed so there’s no point in me worrying about it.

  “Look out! Get out of the way!”

  I turned my head to look up the stairs toward the source of the voice. The first thing I noticed was that I was still standing at the bottom of the stairwell, blocking all foot traffic.

  Man, I’ve been spacing out lately.

  The second thing I noticed was that the voice was coming from ‘that girl.’

  The one you stalk?

  The third thing I noticed was that she was running down the stairs with her phone in her hand, on a collision course with my stupid ass.

  I was so surprised to see her that my feet refused to move. She crashed into me as she came flying down the stairs and we tumbled across the platform, a tangle of flailing limbs.

  This is the second time in just a few minutes that I’ve found myself lying at the bottom of this staircase. I better not make this a habit...

  This time though, I was lying on my back, looking up at the girl who had just crashed into me and, somehow, ended up on top of me. Her face was slightly flushed but it probably wasn’t due to any embarrassment, but rather the fact that she had run here.

  What do I look like through her eyes?

  Better not to think about it.

  The moment was fleeting as she quickly got off of me and brushed herself off before extending her hand out to me.

  “Sorry for running into you.”

  I reached out and grabbed her hand to pull myself up. Thanks to this morning, touching a girl’s hand was like nothing to me (lie).

  “It’s my fault for spacing out at the bottom of the staircase like that.”

  She shook her head.

  “No, it’s my fault for running down the stairs. You couldn’t get out of the way in time.”

  “Of course you were rushing—you were going to be late for school.”

  “Just because I had a reason for running doesn’t make it right.”

  This conversation isn’t going anywhere. We’re each trying to take the blame...

  “Let’s just say we’re both at fault. That only seems fair.”

  She thought for a moment before smiling.

  “That works for me.”

  “The train already left, so I guess we’re both going to be late, huh?”

  5 - The Phone

  “Ah, I must have dropped my phone.”

  That girl swung her head around, looking for where her phone had gone. I joined her in her search—it’s my fault she dropped it, after all. After a few seconds of looking, I spotted it and went over to pick it up. It had managed to slide pretty far away from where we collided, although luckily it had fallen screen-side up, so it probably wasn’t scratched.

  When I bent down to pick it up, I noticed the screen was still on. She must have been looking at it as she was running. That wasn’t important though. What was important was her wallpaper.

  It was a picture of her and some boy sitting next to each other in a restaurant. She looked a few years younger than she was now. She had one of her arms wrapped around one of his, the other held out the phone the picture was taken with. She had a massive grin on her face, while the boy’s face was flushed, his eyes looking bashfully just to the side of the camera. They were definitely close, and almost definitely dating. Based on this picture, thinking that they were just close friends or siblings would be pure fantasy. You would have to be an Olympic-level mental gymnast. There was one question that couldn’t be answered by just this photo though—was he her current boyfriend, or an ex?