“The sooner we get the fuck out of here, the better. Grab as much as you can, so we can go. I’m going to put this in the backseat and then get our bags from your room.”

  I kept searching the boxes until I saw Meg’s name. Two of them were hard to carry, but I was determined to manage it in one trip. By the time I hit the second floor landing Jax was already back upstairs. He took the boxes from me, and smiled. “I saw you eying up that rocking chair. Go get it. We’ll make room.”

  It hadn’t just been mine. It was also Meg’s. I darted back up the stairs and fetched it. My mother stopped me at the front door. “What do you think you’re doing?”

  “It’s mine and I’m taking it. I won’t let someone else have my memories. You may want to pretend that Meg never existed, but she’s the reason I’m determined to make something of my life. She wouldn’t want us to be like this, mother.”

  “Don’t you dare speak to me as if I’ve destroyed this family. You’ve single handedly done that yourself.”

  I sat the chair down and slapped my mother in the face. “How dare you? I’m your daughter, your flesh and blood, yet you cast me out. I lost her too. She was my best friend.”

  “Your carelessness took her away from us.”

  Jax and my father appeared out of different directions. “Amber, don’t speak to your mother in that tone.”

  “I’ll speak to her how I see fit, being that you both treat me like I’m nothing but a burden. You wish it was me that died in that accident don’t you? Just admit it.”

  “You have no idea what we’ve been through. Don’t assume that we feel that way.”

  “No idea what you’ve been through?” I was ready to explode. “Not only did I lose my sister, and my baby, but I was raped. Someone I loved raped me and I was all alone. I had no one to call and support me. You stopped being my parents the day Meg died.”

  “Raped?” My mother asked.

  “Your daughter is very brave. I think she deserves a little respect at the least.” Jax was speaking for me.

  “Stay out of this, son,” my father replied.

  Jax began to laugh, catching all of our attention. “Son?” He hunched over cackling louder. “If you were the last fucking person on earth I wouldn’t call you dad. My father loves his children, even with their flaws. It’s what real parents do with their kids. You cast your own out to fend for herself, and when she was attacked she had nowhere to turn. She’s been through hell, and it’s a miracle she’s still focused on anything. You should be ashamed of yourselves, both of you.”

  Never in my life had I ever felt such an overwhelming adoration to someone as I did in that very moment.

  “Amber and I are leaving. Take your fucking boat ride and shove it up your shallow asses. I won’t let you mistreat her. This shit stops right now!”

  The last time I’d seen Jax’s temper he was trying to kill his brother. This time he was protecting me. How could it not impress me?

  Jax took my hand and pulled me along, rocking chair and all. My parents never came outside to argue. They simply let us leave without an apology or even a fuck you. I was dead to them, and for the first time it felt like I was free.

  Chapter 29

  Amber

  They weren’t going to treat me like shit again. I wouldn’t stand for it. As broken hearted as I was to leave the gated community where I’d once called home, I knew it was necessary. In the seat beside me Jax clenched his jaw out of frustration. I was surprised that he said more to my parents, after they’d disregarded me like the trash. My fear was that I wouldn’t be able to go on without their help. For now I just needed to be as far away from them as humanly possible.

  Jax drove for nearly thirty minutes before pulling over at an expensive hotel. I remembered trying to get a room there before I turned twenty-one and they hadn’t let me. He left me alone in the vehicle to see if they had any vacancies where we could stay for the night. I felt terrible for dragging him along, only to have this occur. He must have thought of me as a lost cause. I’d never met someone with the problems that I carried.

  My cell phone began to ring before I spotted him exiting the establishment. On the other end of the call was my irate father, and he wasted no time giving me a piece of his mind. “Listen here young lady, I don’t care what you have to do, but you get rid of that loud mouthed kid and return to this house.”

  “I’m not coming back. There’s nothing you can say to make that happen.” I was standing my ground, mostly because I knew I had backup.

  Jax saw me on the phone and seemed not too thrilled about it.

  “Amber, are you doing this to hurt us?”

  “No, you listen to me. I’m not someone you can shit on. I’m a human being with feelings. You can’t treat me like an imbecile. I have feelings. You didn’t kill your best friend that night. I loved her more than anything. That accident killed me too.”

  “You’re still alive. It’s your sister’s life that was taken. Don’t be dramatic.”

  “Goodbye, dad.” I tossed the phone back in my purse and looked up at Jax with tear-filled eyes. I was so sick of crying in front of him, as if I was weak. I’d spent too much time learning how to be strong, only to lose my shit when something bad happened.

  “They won’t let it go,” I explained.

  “Fuck them. Come on. Let’s bring our bags to the room. You can take a relaxing bath in the Jacuzzi tub, or nap and calm down before we go out for pancakes.”

  I had to smile through the pain. He knew just what to say to make me feel cared about. “That sounds nice.”

  Jax grabbed our things out of the car and locked it up. Then he took my hand and led me inside to the elevator. Once we were moving up to our floor, he stepped closer and wiped a new set of tears from my eyes. “You don’t deserve to be treated like that. I hope you’re not mad at me for taking you out of there. It wasn’t healthy.”

  “I’m not mad, Jax. I’m grateful. You’re a godsend, and I don’t deserve you, especially now that you know my future is set in stone. I don’t have a choice. As much as I want to think I can manage it on my own, I know I won’t be able to afford the rest of school. Even after what went down, they’ll still offer to pay for my school. It’s already been arranged. I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to walk away from this. If I was in your shoes, I’d think I was a basket case.”

  I could see that Jax didn’t approve of what I was saying, but he bit his tongue and didn’t reply. After we were in the room, he pulled me into his arms and kissed the top of my head. “Go take a hot bath. I’m going to find something to watch on television. Hopefully the detective channel will have a show about how to kill your parents and get away with it. Just so you know,” he added. “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “You’re insane. A bath sounds like a plan.” Agreeing to relax, was like having to breathe. I needed it to be able to survive.

  “With bubbles,” he added.

  “Yes, bubbles.”

  “And Jax.” He laughed when he said it.

  As I walked into the bathroom and put my hand on the lock to fasten it, I backed away. I didn’t need to be scared of Jax, not in any way. Of all the people in my life, I felt the most protected when I was around him. I knew he had a reputation of being a womanizer. I wasn’t born yesterday. A guy that looked like Jax could get just about any girl he wanted. The fact that he was so amused by me left me flabbergasted. Quite frankly I couldn’t understand his attraction. If my life wasn’t a cluster-fuck, today’s events had proven that being around me only brought negativity.

  The hot water in the soaking tub was like heaven as I sank down inside of it. A washrag covered my closed eyes while I lay there in the silence of the room. There was only one thing missing in my near perfect moment, and I was a little leery to admit it.

  “Jax,” I called out. “Can you come here?”

  The door swung open and he entered, as if he were alarmed. “What’s wrong?”

  “There’s something missing in here.”

  “What? Do you need me to grab something from your bag?”

  I shook my head and bit down on my lip.

  “Then what?” It only took him a few seconds to figure it out. A huge smirk filled his face as he approached the bubble-filled bath. “Seriously?”

  I nodded and scooted back to make room for him. The tub wasn’t huge, by any means, but there was plenty of room for both of us. Jake tugged his shirt over his head, and quickly shoved down his shorts and boxers. Standing before me completely naked, he began posing, making muscles. “What are you doing?”

  “It’s my celebratory pose. You like it don’t you?”

  I raised my hand out of the water and used my index finger to motion him to join me.

  Jax jumped in, careful enough to keep the water from running out. His hairy legs rubbed against mine as he got situated. Now face to face, we sat there, completely naked in the small tub. Jax took his toe and rubbed between my legs. I squirmed, but refused to push him away. “You’d be more comfortable if you put your back against my chest.”

  “You just want me to stand up.”

  “Maybe.” He grinned.

  I started lifting my body using the sides to hold my weight up. Jax closed his eyes, and even covered them with his hands. I admired how much he appreciated me to do something so trivial. There was no doubt in my mind that I wanted to be intimate with this man, so there was no reason to keep him from seeing every part of me.

  Being a stripper had gotten easier throughout the months, but I’d never be able to get totally naked. There was a limit to what I was willing to sacrifice for money. This was the only part of me that I kept locked away. Standing up for Jax wasn’t just progress; it was proof that I’d learned to trust again. In a short time he’d shown me that I wasn’t a waste of space. He’d appreciated me, enough to take drastic measures to keep my attention. I couldn’t begin to express how that all made me feel inside.

  As I stood up, allowing the bubbles to leave my bare skin, I reached for his hands, pulling them away from his face. “I’m ready for you to see me, Jax.”

  His eyes opened slowly, narrowing in on my pussy, and then the rest of my body. He didn’t speak as he took my hand and pulled me closer, kissing me there with his soft lips. His hands came around and held onto the cheeks of my ass. Then he turned his head to the side and held me. It was the sweetest thing I’d ever experienced.

  He didn’t go crazy, or crack a joke. He embraced me, out of respect. I couldn’t speak. It was too perfect.

  I ran my hand through his hair, causing him to look up into my eyes. My body was trembling, not because I was cold, but more that I was petrified. This powerful connection couldn’t be denied.

  Warm tears fell down my cheeks while I tried to grasp exactly what was happening between us. This was something I’d never experienced. “Why are you shaking?” He asked.

  “I’m scared.”

  He pulled me down into his arms, until my back was flat against his chest. “What are you scared of,” he whispered into my ear while his head rested on my shoulder.

  “Falling for you.” It was hard to admit it out loud. One week had passed since we first began seeing each other. Was it possible that we could develop something this intense in that little amount of time?

  “Don’t be scared of me. I’d never hurt you. I swear I wouldn’t.”

  I turned and kissed him passionately, expressing my utmost appreciation for everything he’d done. “I trust you.”

  His nose rubbed against mine. “I can’t believe this is happening. You make me want to be a better man.”

  We kissed again, this time savoring each other’s tongues as they mangled about. The way he held me close, the little sounds that escaped him, the electricity that we created together, it all fueled my desire. I needed him, and it was time to stop refusing. I wanted to fall, because I knew he’d be there to catch me.

  “I want to be with you,” I whispered against his mouth.

  Our eyes met as he asked, “Are you sure?”

  “I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life.”

  “I don’t know if I’ve ever made love before, but I know that’s what it’s going to be when I’m with you, Amber. You’re so worth the wait.”

  As hypnotized as I was in the moment, I managed to laugh. “It’s only been a week.”

  “Is that right? It feels like years.”

  His urgency was poking me, but I refused to move. This intense embrace was genuine, and heartfelt. This wasn’t like other guys I’d been involved with. Being with Jax felt like something I wasn’t ready to admit, yet I knew it was there already, just waiting to be explored. “Is this what it feels like to be in a mutual relationship, because if it is, I don’t think I’ve ever been in one before.”

  He played with my chin and kissed me softly. “I’ve been in one serious relationship, and we both know how it ended. I wasn’t looking for another one, but baby, you’ve got me so fucking messed up over you. You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.”

  “It’s a good thing I don’t want you to go anywhere.”

  “Hopefully we’ll be able to get out of this tub, because once the water gets cool the Jaxinator might need to go into his hidey hole. He doesn’t like being cold.”

  I stood up, shocking Jax with my boldness, and extended my hand for him to take. “Take me to bed or lose me forever.” It was from a movie I’d seen a zillion times.

  He rolled his eyes. “I can’t compete with Goose. God rest his soul.”

  “The fact that you know that turns me on, Jax.”

  Instead of letting me help him up, he took his hands and placed them on my legs, sliding them in the direction of my hips. His face was right there, in front of my most private area. I watched him narrowing in and parting his mouth. Then I felt him there, kissing me again while sliding his wet lips over my tender skin. “I’ve dreamed about doing this to you.” He looked up at me watching him. “About tasting you.”

  I tried to keep composure, though it wasn’t without a lot of effort. The more he kissed and teased me with his mouth the faster I was losing the ability to think.

  The second I felt his tongue entering me, my knees began to buckle. This wasn’t like his fingers exploring me. This was his sensual muscle, taking me to new heights. His precision was well-practiced, and he knew exactly where to lick. I dug my hands into his hair, keeping his head from backing away. Jax held onto my ass using his nose and whiskers to add pleasure. He sucked on my clit, pulling, and twisting it between his closed teeth. I cried out, unable to fathom that something could feel this good. He knew he had me where he wanted me, and I refused to fight it. This was what I held out for. The perpetual feeling of being overwhelmed with satisfaction, without fear. This was what Christian felt when she was with Ethan, and probably why Reese couldn’t resist Jake. I finally understood, and it only helped this sensual moment become one of the best experiences I’d ever had. “Tonight is about me and you, Amber. Nothing else matters, do you understand? There’s no parents, no school, and certainly no ex’s. We’re alone, and nothing is going to stop us.”

  “Okay,” was all I could say.

  Jax helped me out of the tub, laying a towel on the floor so I wouldn’t slip. We didn’t dress, because it wasn’t necessary. When our feet reached the bed he turned around to face me and took my hands into his. “I don’t know the first thing about being romantic, but I’ll try my best to make you happy tonight. Above all I want you to know that if you feel uncomfortable, at any point, you just say the word and I’ll stop.”

  “I appreciate that.”

  He lifted my hand to his lips. “Do we make love now, or have pancakes first?” His smile was irresistibly contagious, and I didn’t even mind that he’d broken the mood. He knew I needed to be comfortable, and that was his only goal.

  I sat down on the bed and pulled him alongside of me. “I’m not hungry for pancakes, Jax. It’s been over a year since I’ve been with someone. I vote we have sex now, and then maybe after pancakes, if being with me is good enough to want seconds.”

  He chuckled and shook his head. “Woman, when are you going to see what I see when I look at you? Not only are you gorgeous, probably the sexiest woman I’ve ever seen in my life, but you’re smart, and you’re fragile. You need me, which makes me want to protect you. There’s nothing about you that would deter me. I’m in this. I told you that already.”

  “It’s too good to be true.”

  “No, it’s not. We’ve both suffered. Maybe it’s time we get to be happy.” His lips connected with mine, as he pulled me on top of him. I could feel his strong arms holding me tight, but I didn’t feel trapped.

  “What if we’re rushing?” I was stalling, because I needed him to be sure.

  “I’ve never wanted another woman like I want you. That’s the truth. I could fuck you like the other’s I’ve been with, but I don’t want to. With you I’m going to take my time, because it’s important that I memorize every single detail of this.” He brought his fingers up and ran them over my lips before kissing me again. “It’s not every day that a man gets to be with the woman of his dreams.”

  I was putty in his hands at this point. There was no going back. We were about to make love. Two people with little experience on the subject were about to embark on a journey together, not knowing where it would lead us, and I wasn’t at all scared.

  Chapter 30

  Jax

  Her beauty intoxicated me, sending me into a drunken stupor each time we touched. This wasn’t someone I wanted to rush it with. No, with Amber I needed to take my time, savoring every single inch of her bronzed skin. Her hair dripped down over her exposed breasts, making me salivate with anticipation of licking it off. I took one nipple into my mouth, sucking hard until the skin turned pink. As I pulled away I watched her shove back in my direction, as if to silently ask for a repeat embrace. The harder her tips became, the more attention I wanted to give to them. Using my tongue I flicked each one, nibbling on them. Little cries escaped Amber’s lips as I continued enjoying her supple breasts. I suckled her tiny nipple, trapping it again in between my teeth.