I couldn’t blame her. It wasn’t as if I had anything to offer someone like her. She came from such a great family, and even if she didn’t succeed on her own, they’d be there to support her financially and emotionally anyway.

  I knew all of this because a long time ago I’d had the same kind of life. It saddened me to think about it now, but there was no way to go back and change things. I’d tried doing that for years, with no result except for constant misery.

  That night while lying in the next room over from Isabella, I listened to her crying. She was clearly in a bad way, seemingly distraught about something she neglected to tell her cousin. I wondered if it was their little argument, or something else all together. The idea of her being so close to me, but not being able to offer her support was disappointing.

  For hours on end she sobbed, until finally everything became silent. All that could be heard was the insects that were outdoors. I stayed awake a little while longer, not that it was anything new. I hadn’t had a good night’s sleep in as long as I could remember.

  Nightmares were a constant for me, so avoiding rest was necessary. On most nights I’d take walks, or drink coffee to avoid being tired. By the time I rested, I was so beat that I didn’t dream. I’d gotten used to it, and in some ways it was just habit.

  The next morning Noah neglected to wake me. Since there was no alarm in my room I only opened my eyes when I heard someone moving around. I headed for the bathroom to relieve myself and was met with Isabella in a towel. Her hair was wet, and I think the shock of seeing me again displayed on her face. “Mornin’,” I said in my best voice.

  She never even flinched a smile. “I forgot you were here.”

  “It’s all good. I just need to use the bathroom. Do you mind?” I pointed toward the bathroom door and watched as she went into her room. When I was done brushing my teeth, I headed out to go to work, hoping to catch another glimpse of her. Unfortunately, she’d gone into her room and had the door shut. I could hear the hairdryer running, knowing for sure that she wouldn’t be out for a long time.

  After grabbing some coffee, I headed out to work. My daily chores were hard and strenuous, but I enjoyed the way they kept me busy. I’d taken a liking to working with some of the horses that Shalan, Noah’s fiancée, had purchased. The newest one, named Titan, was acquired as a wild colt and hadn’t been broken yet. It was going to take me a while, but I was determined to make it happen. In fact, I spent most of my evenings with that horse in the stables, resting against a bed of hay, reading. Aside from the training, I felt that it was best to make the horse feel comfortable around me. To be honest, I enjoyed the solitary of it all. The less people I was around, the less I had to pretend who I was.

  When the plumbers arrived at my trailer I knew my time staying in the same house as Isabella was about to end. Determined to make a good impression, I decided to cook them both dinner for their hospitality. Grilling had always been something that I was good at, so I picked up some corn, zucchini, and chicken and got to work.

  She pulled up just as I was finishing up, giving me a questionable look as she exited her vehicle. I could already tell that my being around annoyed her.

  For the most part she never talked to me. I knew it was for the best, still I yearned for her to notice me, just so I could look into those beautiful eyes with little effort. Her dress was tight around her ass, forcing me to fight with myself to not stare. By the time I found her breasts in the low cut shirt, I knew I was doomed.

  I focused on the chicken before she could notice and call me out. Her presence alarmed me, causing me to stiffen my stance. “What’s all this?” she asked.

  “Just a little supper to say thanks for putting up with me. I hope you like chicken and vegetables.”

  “I love them. That’s real kind of you, Rusty. Considerin’ that I worked through lunch, it’s perfect.”

  I threw her a smile, and couldn’t take my eyes off of her beautiful face. Right away I knew it was a mistake. She looked down for a second and then back to me. “Why do you look at me like that?”

  I let my eyes fall to the grilling food. “Like what?” “I don’t know. It’s weird, but you’re always doin’ it.” I knew I was going to come across as creepy. “Sorry. It’s just

  the way I look at people, I guess. I don’t mean to offend you in any way.”

  “What’s your deal anyway?” She sat down on a chair near the grill and crossed her legs. I tried so hard not to notice the way her thighs lifted at the bottom, almost displaying the skin of her ass.

  “I don’t have a deal. I work the ranch, and train the horses.”

  “No,” she was determined to keep digging. “You’ve got to have a back story. My cousin told me you’re in your thirties. Obviously you’ve been doin’ something for all these years, so spill. Who is Rusty?”

  I finally looked in her direction, clenching my jaw as I contemplated making something up. “There’s no back story. I’ve traveled different places and decided to settle down here in Kentucky. It’s beautiful, and the hunting is good.”

  She raised her brow, seemingly trying to read me. “I hardly think that you’re tellin’ me everything. You’re sayin’ that you’ve been traveling for your whole adult life?”

  “There’s nothing to tell, I can assure you.”

  “You were in jail weren’t you?” Her question offended me, even though she had every right to assume that.

  “No. I haven’t been in jail.” I couldn’t even laugh about it. “Are you runnin’ from the law?” I put the tongs down and let both of my hands fall to my

  sides. “Why do you want to know about me? Are you interested or something?”

  It was sure fire way to make her leave me alone. I could tell from her vibes that she wanted nothing to do with me that way.

  “No. I’m not interested what so ever. I’m done with men in general, especially after recent events. Besides, my father would die if I was datin’ a mysterious ranch hand that was much older than me. I reckon I’m just bein’ nosey, that’s all.”

  “You’ve got nothing to worry about, ma’am. I can assure you that I mean you no harm. I’m not a criminal, or some kind of stalker.” I chuckled to myself knowing how creepy I sounded. “I’m simply living a quiet life off the beaten path.”

  “You’re weird, that’s for sure. I’m goin’ to go change for dinner, and leave you to be alone, like you obviously prefer.” With that statement she headed into the house.

  If she only knew that I longed for the company of a beautiful woman. I just knew that I didn’t deserve it. This was my punishment for my past. There was no way to rectify what had been done, therefore I refused to give myself hope.

  Noah pulled in on a Gator moments later. “I made dinner,” I announced proudly.

  “Damn, I wish I could stay. My girl flew in early and I’m on my way to pick her up from the airport. We’ll probably get dinner in town on our way home. Thanks for the sentiment. I appreciate it, but I can’t pass up seein’ my woman.”

  I understood completely. If he only knew how envious I was at the life he had, especially considering that mine used to be so similar.

  “Go on and get out of here then. I’ll make sure to save you both a plate anyway.”

  “Sorry for leavin’ you to deal with Bells. She’s been such a bitch lately. I swear that chick’s had her period for the past month.”

  I laughed to myself. “I’ll be sure to eat in silence, just in case she plans to attack.”

  Once Noah went inside I stood there happily cooking, knowing that in just a little while I was going to be in the company of a gorgeous woman for a meal that I prepared. Sure, it certainly wasn’t a date, but it was probably the closest that I was going to get to one, with her especially.

  Chapter 7

  Isabella

  I heard my cousin come into the house when I was pulling on a pair of shorts. He knocked on my door before just helping himself to opening it. “Seriously, I’m tryin’ to change in here.”

  “Whatever. I ain’t lookin’. I just wanted you to know that I’m headin’ in town to pick up Shalan. She caught an earlier flight. You’re goin’ to have to eat dinner with Rusty tonight alone.”

  “What?” That wasn’t going to happen. “He’s creepy as shit. Have you seen the way he looks at me?”

  He laughed. “Get over yourself, Bells. He’s a nice guy. Just eat the fuckin’ meal and then you can come back in here and sulk in your room all night.”

  “Screw you, Noah.”

  “I’ll see you later.” He waved as he closed my bedroom door behind him.

  I was pissed, especially because the man outside made me leery. Something about him was off and I couldn’t put my finger on it. Normally I could care less who my family had working for them. Hell, Mr. Harvey had been working for my poppy since before I was born. If anyone had a secret past it was him, seeing as he was in the country illegally. He’d snuck over the border when he was twenty, and still sent money back to his family.

  My judgment over Rusty was nothing like that. He had secret written all over his face, and it bothered me. I didn’t want to think that my family was harboring a fugitive, or maybe even worse.

  Knowing that I’d hear a wrath of shit when Noah got back, I threw my hair into a ponytail and decided that it was just one meal. I’d eat the food, and lock myself in my room afterwards. No harm, no foul.

  By the time I came back outside with plates and silverware, my cousin had already left to pick up Shalan. Rusty stood over the grill, placing the food on a large tray to the side. I sat down at the picnic table and laid out the forks and knives next to the plates. He walked over and sat the tray down. “What would you like to drink? I can go grab it.”

  I sat down in front of one of the settings, promising myself that I was going to be nice to the guy, for the small amount of time it took me to eat. “Sure. Tea is fine, or a beer. Whatever you’re havin’.”

  He brought out two iced teas, and then sat down across from me. I helped myself to the hot food, and smiled when he pushed the glass in my direction. “We’re never going to eat all of this food.”

  “I’m starvin’, so you may be wrong.” It was the truth. Sometimes when I got busy at work I’d forget to eat. This had been one of those days. My stomach rumbled as I poked my fork into the grilled vegetables.

  They tasted delicious. “These are amazin’.”

  He smiled and took a bite himself. “Thanks. Cooking is a hobby of mine.”

  After tasting the chicken I was convinced of one thing. “You’re wastin’ your talent workin’ on this stinky ass ranch, that’s for sure.”

  He laughed and kept eating. I took a sip of tea, while watching him. Once he was finished chewing he took a drink and then replied to me. “I happen to enjoy what I do. As far as the cooking goes, whenever you want some, feel free to stop by my trailer.”

  I think he and I both realized exactly at the same time what he’d just offered. I didn’t know what to say, or even if we were on the same page. Perhaps he was just being a nice man, or it was possible that he was asking me to join him because he was interested. “I, don’t, um -.”

  “I didn’t mean it the way it sounded, Isabella. Maybe it came out wrong. All I was saying is that you were welcome to eat dinner. I meant nothing else by it.”

  “It’s not that.” I felt bad for acting so stuck up. “Sorry. I’m just all messed up right now. I wish I could explain things more, but some people around here like to get all up in my business. That’s why I refuse to discuss it.”

  He placed the silverware down on his plate and folded his hands. “I’m not an open book either, as you’ve probably been able to tell. Some things aren’t anyone’s business but our own.”

  For the first time I saw something different in this stranger. We could relate, obviously from secrets that we both kept, but it was enough to catch my interest. “I agree.”

  It was quick, but I could have sworn that I saw a smile form in the corner of his lips. As fast as it was there, it disappeared. “Noah tells me that you visited your family this weekend past. How did that go?”

  It was small talk, and for the time being it was okay. “Fine, I guess. I saw people that I missed a lot.”

  “I bet it’s hard being so far away from them. I heard you crying the night you came home. Was it because you wish you were home with your parents?”

  Immediately I was offended. He’d listened to me crying and now he was prying. “That’s none of your business. Look, I agreed to have dinner tonight because you obviously took the time to cook it, but we’re not friends. I’m not goin’ to sit here pretendin’ we’re friends. You work for my family. That’s it.”

  I stood up and rushed toward the kitchen door. He came after me, meeting me inside. “Isabella, I didn’t mean to -.”

  I cut him off. “Just stop.” “What? What did I say?” “First, you can stop calling me Isabella. It’s weird. Nobody

  calls me that.” “Okay. What do you like to be called?” I threw up my hands. This guy wasn’t getting it. Couldn’t

  he take a hint that I was damaged and not interested in being buddies? “This is pointless. Thank you for dinner, Rusty. Just leave the dishes in the sink. I’ll clean them in a little while.”

  I began to walk away when I heard him talking. What he said stopped me dead in my tracks. “I hated hearing you cry. It reminds of something in my past. I wish I could talk about it, but like you I know I can’t. Sometimes we need to walk away from what we want. I guess it’s part of life, even though it feels like torture.”

  I turned around and tried my best to relate to whatever he meant. “Look, we don’t know each other. You seem like you’re a nice guy. If I was lookin’ for a friend this might have gone differently. Right now my life is too messed up to even consider it. I enjoyed dinner. None of this is about you, Rusty. I’ve got demons that I’m tryin’ to get rid of, and so do you obviously. A friendship between us would just add fuel to the fire.”

  He went back outside, only to come in to put his plate in the sink. I watched him walk outside and start cleaning up again. A part of me wanted to apologize. He seemed like I’d offended him, and I probably had. For someone that didn’t want to be a jerk, it was exactly what I was being.

  Rusty stayed away from me after that night. Shalan came home and things got back to normal. We were planning her wedding, which was keeping me busy enough to not dwell on my ex. Noah was finally off my back, and for the most part I felt better about everything that was happening in my life.

  I’d seen Rusty in passing, but with the exception of a couple waves from him, he’d steered clear of me. I didn’t blame him after I’d been such a bitch. Honestly, nothing would ever come out of a friendship with him. I knew my family, and what they’d say if I got involved with someone like him. Since I wanted them as far out of my business as possible, I chose to push him away. Sure, he was handsome, even for being ten years older than me. His almost black hair and gray eyes were very easy on the eyes, especially when riding by and seeing him shirtless. Just because he was good to look at didn’t mean I wanted to hang out.

  Before I knew it two months had gone by. Noah had built a house for Shalan, and they were about to move in it. I was actually looking forward to taking over the house, and redecorating. The deer heads were cool when we were kids, but Noah’s once bachelor pad needed a makeover.

  Everyone on the ranch came to lend a helping hand on moving day. My aunt Van and my grandma Karen came to help make food for all of the men while they did the heavy lifting. I was carrying one of the last boxes over to the flat bed trailer when I spotted Rusty walking toward me. I sat the box down and stood up straight to face him. “Noah sent me over here to grab this stuff. Is this all of it?”

  “This is it.” I pointed to the boxes.

  He wiped beads of sweat off of his forehead. “Do you mind if I have a glass of water? They picked up some beer, but I don’t drink.”

  I’d noticed that, but been afraid to ask him at the time. “Sure. Be right back.” I ran inside and got two bottles of water. After handing Rusty one of them I stood there quenching my own thirst.

  “It’s hot as hell out here today,” he said before finishing off the water. Then he wiped his face with his shirt. I caught one

  glimpse of a rock hard stomach before he saw me. With nothing to say to get out of it, I changed the subject.

  “So, how come you don’t drink?”

  “Personal reasons. For the most part it’s because I grew up around alcoholics.” When he didn’t get into further detail I knew I had to back off.

  “That’s understandable.”

  We stood for a moment in complete silence. When it got to be too awkward Rusty handed me his bottle. “Thanks for the water, Iz.”

  I opened my mouth but nothing would come out.

  He smiled, as if he knew that name was special to me. “Is that okay? I mean, you told me not to call you Isabella.”

  “I guess. Only my father calls me by that.”

  “Have a good afternoon then.” He left me standing there, and I wasn’t sure if I liked it. It was as if he was giving me the cold shoulder. I certainly deserved it, especially after the way I’d been cold to him. Still, each time I was around him things were weird. I was determined to figure it out, even if it required me to have more conversations with the mysterious man. Little by little he was revealing things about himself. If I gave him the chance, I might be able to get to the bottom of it.

  Knowing that it was going to require me to be nice, I decided that it was as good as any time to change my attitude. I’d been withdrawn for too long.

  Getting to know Rusty a bit more would help me make that push I needed to be able to go out and consider dating again. One day I’d find someone that cared about me, who wouldn’t ever want to be with anyone else. I had to stay positive and believe that it would happen.

  In the two months that I’d gone without talking to Tate I was starting to finally be able to accept that we were never meant to be together. My pain was replaced with resentment and hate, which I was finally okay with feeling. He’d hurt me in