The room got quiet and Rusty sat down at the kitchen table, refusing to look my way. I suppose all men were stubborn like that.

  “He’s the baby’s father. It’s the right thing to do.”

  “Is it what you want though? Because the way you’re acting is as if you’re choosing to be with him. Is that it? That’s what you want?”

  I looked down at the old, warn, blue carpet. “It doesn’t matter what I want. The baby comes before everything.”

  “Just answer the question, Iz.”

  I stood up and walked toward the chair where he sat. It was unnerving how much pull he had on my heart. I closed my eyes when I answered, because I knew I couldn’t lie while looking in his direction. “I don’t love you, Rusty. I’m sorry. You deserve to know the truth.” While saying it, I lost control and started blubbering.

  He turned around and looked at me with painstaking eyes. “Why are you crying then?”

  “I need to leave. I’ll tell my parents that you couldn’t come.”

  Rusty grabbed my arm, preventing me from exiting the house. “I’m coming with you.”

  “You’re kiddin’? I just told you that I don’t love you, and you’re...”

  He didn’t let me get the words out. His lips found mine and I was a puddle of angst in his hands. I didn’t know whether to push him away, slap him, or throw my arms around him and beg him to take me back to bed.

  I pulled away and put my hands up to keep him from coming forward. That pain in his eyes from before was back, and I knew it was because I’d hurt him. “You’re shirt’s on wrong. At least fix it before we go to my house.”

  There was no use in arguing. If Rusty wanted to go along with this charade for my parents it would at least give me time to figure out how I was going to tell Tate about the baby. Even

  a little time with Rusty was better than knowing he was on the same ranch as me and I couldn’t be with him. How this all played out was still in the air. All I knew was that for the moment I was going to have to be content with Rusty at my side.

  My parents insisted on driving their SUV to the restaurant. I sat in the back with my hands folded, waiting for them to start asking us questions from the front seat. I expected my father to be all over Rusty’s business, but he said nothing to him, well not until we made it the establishment.

  It was pretty obvious that he was collecting questions to ask while we traveled. At least he let us order breakfast before he started with third degree.

  “How old are you, Rusty?”

  “Thirty three,” he answered and sipped his coffee, adding another sugar without taking his eyes off of my dad.

  “Where are you from?”

  He tasted his coffee again and seemed to be content with the amount of flavor it had. “Indiana. I lived in Maryland as a child.”

  “Are your parents living?” My mother asked. “Yep.” “What do they do?” My dad was wiggling his leg under the

  table. I could see the water in my glass shaking and recognized it right away.

  “My father is a veterinarian, or was. He’s retired now.” Rusty was being so calm, and I knew it was to prove to me that he could be the man I needed him to be.

  “Have you ever been married.”

  He clenched his jaw, and looked away. I knew he didn’t want to talk about his wife.

  “Dad, seriously?”

  “What? I just want to know if he’s got another life out there somewhere. He could be a bigamist trying to look for his seventh sister-wife.”

  I put my hands over my face, completely embarrassed. “He’s not a bigamist.”

  “Fine. When was your last relationship?”

  The jaw was steady moving, but this time he placed his hands flat on the table and answered. “Two years ago.”

  “Who ended it?” “Dad, please.” I was begging. “God did.” Everyone at the table stopped moving. My

  parents looked at each other, and while they were considering what to say next, I put my hand under the table and placed it on his thigh. I already knew his story, and he needed to know that he could get through this. “Can you excuse me for a minute. I’m just going to go wash my hands.”

  Rusty got up and walked toward the bathroom. I leaned across the table so I didn’t have to say it too loud. “I told you to stop.”

  “How were we supposed to know? What happened?”

  “Mom, I can’t talk to you about it. He keeps that part of his life locked up. I’m real surprised he told you what he did. Uncle Colt and Noah have no idea. He’s not a drifter, he’s just a broken man with a lost soul. You can choose to believe me or not.”

  My mom put her hands up to her face. I could tell she was worried. My dad shook his head and looked at me. “How are we supposed to trust this guy when he has secrets?”

  I nodded, and smiled when I saw Rusty coming back to the table. He scooted in beside me and I tucked my arm inside of his immediately. “Are you okay?”

  He looked up at my parents when he answered me. “Yeah, I’m great.”

  Our food came shortly after that, giving my parents a reason to take a break. I ate quietly with my right hand, while keeping my left on his leg again. I think rusty surprised everyone when he insisted on paying for the meal. The ride home was quiet, and I was grateful. When we arrived back at the ranch he shook my dad’s hand and thanked my mom before telling me that he had to go. I knew it was because he wanted to be alone, and a part of me hurt for him knowing why. I hated that he couldn’t talk about them without losing it, and what made it worse was that now my parents were sure he had secrets.

  At least they waited until he left to start talking about him. “I don’t know, honey. He seems like he’s got problems.”

  “Dad, please. I’m an adult. I think I can make my own decisions. Besides, we’ve got a party tonight, and I know you didn’t come all the way here to meddle in my love life.”

  He pulled me into a hug. “Sorry. It’s my job to worry. You can always come home with us if you need to. Just remember that.”

  I think that once Rusty was gone they loosened up. My mom made plans to come back to Kentucky when I went in for my first sonogram to see the sex of the baby, and we talked about what we could do to the spare room to get it ready for the little one. By the end of the day I think they were finally able to look at me and act normal. It was a step in the right direction.

  Now all I had to do was convince the rest of the family, and then break the news that the one person they all hated in the world was really the father of my child.

  Piece of cake!

  Chapter 25

  Rusty

  I had to get away from them. In all of the times that I’d played it out in my head on the way there I’d never

  once thought about breaking down in front of them. They had every right to question me about my past, and yet I couldn’t even open up for her. I wanted to be that guy that she could depend on, but I’d pretty much screwed it all up with my own insecurities.

  Isabella didn’t stop by for the rest of the afternoon, and with what happened the night before, I never even got a call from Noah telling me to come help out. I could accept that they all wanted to keep their distance from me, well all except Isabella. She had me so confused, and I had no idea what I was going to do about it.

  It seemed like every day she had a reason that we shouldn’t be together. She kept trying to convince me that there was nothing between us, but then she’d turn around and spend the night, or hold onto me when we were around her parents.

  That night, when I knew their whole family was celebrating, I stayed locked away in my trailer, unable to be around any of them, most of all Isabella. I’d gone to breakfast with her, but the day had given me a ton of time to think about recent events. The truth was that if she wanted me she would tell me. I couldn’t keep forcing myself on her if I expected her to figure out what she wanted on her own.

  My mother used to tell me that if I loved something I needed to let it go to see if it would come back to me. This was what she meant, and I knew it was going to be difficult. Considering that I’d spent so much time thinking about her, especially since we’d been intimate, it was impossible to sit around knowing she was so close. All I wanted to do was head to the party and sweep her off her feet.

  I could hear music playing in the distance, and honestly felt left out. A part of me longed to have a family again; to be a part of something that was unbreakable. The only problem with that was knowing what could happen when I opened my heart again. Isabella had already shot me down, so many times that I stopped counting. She’d told me to stay out of her life several times, leaving me to head back here and be miserable.

  I didn’t know how I was supposed to move forward, and let her go at the same time. While contemplating my options, someone knocked on my door. Excitement was soon turned to disappointment when I saw her dad standing there. “Do you mind if I come in?”

  I opened the door and motioned for him to take a seat. His pockets were full of beers and he offered me one right away.

  I put my hands up. “No thanks.”

  “More for me.” I could tell he’d had a few from the way he said it. Just to be safe, I sat on the opposite side of the room.

  “Is everything okay?”

  “I came to talk to you about my daughter. She’s asked me to leave your past alone, but you can understand how that concerns me.” He took a few sips of his beer before continuing. “I think that in light of this situation between the two of you it would help everyone if we could spend more time together. Since we’re leaving in the morning, I am here to invite you to come to North Carolina and see where my daughter grew up. We can spend some one on one time together, and start over without my relatives breathing down your back. I trust my daughter, Rusty, but she kept you a secret, and until I can figure out why I’m going to keep my guard up.”

  I sat there across from him with my elbows propped on my knees. The man had every right to feel the way he did. I could have made things better by telling him the truth, but that wasn’t an option for me, not until I could figure out how to handle myself without losing my shit in front of him.

  “I’d be glad to accompany your daughter to North Carolina. I hope that it will put your mind at ease.”

  He stood up and I did the same. When he walked up closer to me I didn’t know what to expect. He put his arm on my shoulder and looked down at the floor. “I’m still pissed you knocked up my daughter, but my wife says I’ve got to try. She wears the pants in our house, so I don’t have a choice. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll learn how to accept that. Iz is exactly like her mother.”

  The distraught man turned and left without saying anything else.

  For a while I sat back down and thought about what I wanted to do. On one hand I felt like I needed to let Isabella know that her father had come to me. On the other, I knew she needed space. My concern was that if I gave her that space it could all backfire on me, leaving me more alone than I’d ever been before.

  It wasn’t long until another knock came to my door. I half expected to open it and see her father back again, since he already looked as if he’d thrown back a few too many. I couldn’t blame him.

  This time when I opened the door I was met with one of Isabella’s brothers. He stepped inside before I ask him to. “Which one are you?”

  He looked around the room, and then finally toward me. “Jax.”

  “So what’s up? Your dad was just hear a bit ago. Were you looking for him?”

  “Nah. My dad’s got nothing to do with my visit.”

  I leaned against my arm chair, feeling a little uncomfortable about this kid being in my house. There was something strange about the way he was looking at me. “So what’s up? Did your sister send you here?”

  He smiled, as if I was way off. “Nope. I came here because something’s been bugging me since last night. You see, me and Jake are real close to our sister. We know things that our parents don’t.”

  “Just tell me why you’re here. I’m not in the mood to decipher some hidden agenda of yours.” He was annoying the shit out of me. I had enough to worry about than him standing there talking in code.

  “That baby she’s carrying, well I don’t think it’s yours. I haven’t asked my sister, but I know for a fact that she spent the night with her ex a while back. I’ve been doing the math in my head for the last twenty-fours hours. She’s never once mentioned you, dude. The whole family is asking her questions, and she refuses to talk about it.”

  All I could think about was the fact that he’d thrown his sister’s secret out to me. What if I didn’t know about her being with the ex? It was possible that she’d cheated on me, for all he knew. “You’ve got no right to come in here and make these kinds of accusations.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong. I’m not here to get to the bottom of some conspiracy. Some things are better left unsaid. I’m here because that baby is going to need a dad. So I’m going to ask you once. Are you just covering for my sister, or do you care about her?”

  “I’m not covering for anyone.”

  “You didn’t answer the question.” He was plucking my nerves. What did this guy want from me?

  “Just tell me why you’re here.”

  “My sister has this problem with letting go of her ex. Yesterday she found out he’d tried to end his life, and I’ve got this feeling that she tried to contact him. I checked her phone last night and saw that she called North Carolina. I’m sure if I called the number, he’d answer. Now the way I see it you’ve got options. You can help me make sure she stays in Kentucky, or you can make sure that she’s never going to want to be with that common asshole again.”

  “You seem to harbor some ill feelings toward this guy. She doesn’t talk much about him. Can you tell me what’s so bad?”

  “He cheated on my sister for years. On one occasion she was assaulted because of him. God only knows what else he’s done to her, aside from lowering her self esteem and causing her to want to leave her home in hopes of getting away from him.”

  The more he explained, the more I understood. In fact, it was all starting to make sense. “I appreciate that you want what’s best for your sister. I wouldn’t have stood up and taken responsibility if I didn’t expect to step in. Your sister means a lot to me, and I intend to do whatever it takes to prove that to her, and to the rest of the family.”

  He stuck his hand out and did some kind of special handshake. I tried to go along with it, failing terribly. “I guess you’re not a douche after all then.”

  “Thanks, I think.”

  He started to leave and stepped back inside. “Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you that if you hurt her, I’ll do the same to you. It’s not a threat. It’s a promise.”

  “If I had a sister I’d do the same.” I waved when he walked away and closed the door when he disappeared into the darkness.

  It was odd to me that he’d stopped by while the party was going on, and I couldn’t help but wonder what his sister was doing. Another thing that wouldn’t leave my mind was the fact that she’d contacted her ex. It made sense why she’d tried to push me away.

  Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had to convince her to be with me, because if I didn’t I’d surely lose her forever. She’d move right back to her old life, without a second thought. I had to figure out a way to convince her to stay. She needed a reason to want to be with me. I had to prove to her that I’d be a good father to her child, no matter what I had to do.

  Chapter 26

  Isabella

  I can’t explain why it felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off of me. Even though my family only knew half of the truth, it was still enough to keep me from worrying so much.

  While everyone around me talked about the upcoming nuptials, I sat at a table with my mother, quietly wishing that Rusty was around. Then I thought about Tate, and what he must have been thinking when he attempted to end his life. If he’d known I was pregnant would that have saved him? Was it worth me telling him at all? Could someone like him even be saved?

  Suddenly realizing that my mind was in a clusterfuck of emotional turmoil, I decided to ask the advice of the one woman that had been through it all before. “Mom, if you had the chance to do it all over again, would you have told the sperm donor that I was his child?”

  She was most definitely caught off guard. “Why on earth are you askin’ me that? Do you regret tellin’ Rusty that he’s the father of your child? Is there somethin’ you want to tell me about him?”

  I immediately shook my head to reassure her she was way off base. “Of course not. He’s a good man. I’m sure he’ll be a great dad. This pregnancy just has me thinkin’ about things. I just want to know if you regret tellin’ him. I mean, you would have ended up with Dad anyway. It’s a simple question.”

  “Honey, I don’t know how to answer that. Your dad and I got together because of the shit that man put me through.

  Things could have ended up differently, and I’d never wish that. Our life is wonderful, and in some ways I’m glad that man didn’t want anything to do with us. So no, I don’t regret it. Although, I do sometimes regret the choice to sleep with him in the first place, but then I think about you and remember that even at the worst times somethin’ beautiful can happen.”

  “I guess I understand. It’s just hard knowing that he didn’t want us. I don’t want that for my baby.”

  “Of course you don’t. Honey, all of those crazy thoughts you’re havin’ is normal. Your hormones are going crazy inside of your body. They’re goin’ to affect your decision makin’.”

  My mom and I both looked up when we saw Noah sitting down across from us. He folded his hands like he was waiting for his turn. My mom touched my arm. “We’ll finish this later.”

  I leaned my chin on my fist and prepared to be reamed out, knowing he’d probably built up enough anger to fuel a locomotive. “Go ahead. Let me have it.”

  I could tell he was uneasy. “Bells, I just want you to be happy.”

  Though I’d always considered him predictable, this was definitely a new side of my cousin. “Come again?”